i dont want study

help me....
i dont want study already
i wanna go back to kl......
desperately wanna go back kl and dont want study..
but i got no choice......
need to stay.....
stay till 26 nov...
god god god....
hate this..hate this
hate translation...
hate translator..

empty day again ?????

i tried my best to study study and study....but...it seems like not really well. processing..i start study at about 11 something in the morning..end up at about 2 something..my god.. then find ppl chat..even called my mom...i was so so so boring just keep on studying bout the same thing..i really want to say that i love biology..i love biology very much..i want to study biology...at least there is something diff..now the thing i am studying..not to say everything same..i need to remember everything but is actually a same thing from many ppl talking in diff ways..my god my god my god..is a quite empty day again for me..i going to die on the exam week....hm hm hm...my mind keep thinking about going back to kl....what should i do? my heart wanted to do very well in the exam and i am nervous cos fo the exam but...hm hm..just dont have the dedication to study well....tell me...what should i do and what can i do? struggling............ hope asali is with me now..... asali, love u so much...

i am so so amazing

how can i be so amazing......today should be study more than yesterday but...wow...after two pages then fall in sleep..then try to study again...fall in sleep again..so amazing right? hm....and yea...finally i got nothing today..haha...but when i chatting with ppl in msn..i was awake and energetic...haha..never fall in sleep while chatting even it is late night...so amazing right? why have to study? is so so so so tiring and boring..why not do some interactive things to evaluate on us instead of having exam? ........................speechless....become crazier day by day....hope will become better soon..... today i become topoli for someone.....haha..... so cute...topoli.... :P haha....hope everything will be end soon..and i can go back kl enjoy enjoy enjoy......

my home sweet home

yesterday i left my home sweet home to my friend's room because study week coming. yea..today is the first day of the study week..hm hm..whole day is online, chatting, grammar, sleep and eat.. thats all i did for today. and yes today i finally know who i am in someone heart now....hahhahahaha... askim, bene seni cok seviorum, tesekur. i am scare for the final exam but i dont know what i can do..i tried to do some grammar exercieses..is quite boring but have to do it also..my course is quite weird..my friend busying studying lot of books..but i just doing some grammar exercises online and yes..i dont know to read..this make me more scare....hm hm...i dont know where to start..i am always a science class student..and you know..science class plus is bio class..sure lot of things to study and to remember..but now i dont have book....my god..how? i not used to it actually...feeling dont know how...just like wasting time online-ing although i did do some grammar exercises..the level of my english course now is diff than those when i was in secondary or even muet...is much much more specific and harder...haiz..i cant imagine my result..................................

i am crazy

yes..i think i am getting crazy..think nonsense everyday...dont know what i am thinking...hm hm...everyday just fool around like a fool..today i got very bad result in the quiz that i did last two weeks..my god...i dont know how to face the final that will be coming on the end of the year..i am so scare about that...everytime i get quite bad result in quiz..i feel very stress...and sometime i really dont know what i am thinking....i hope to get something but i just cant get it...hm hm hm..mayb sometimes ''can meet but cannot force'' that is what a phrase in chinese said...hm hm...haiz..my heart feel quite jealous bout something but is stupid if i tell it out...haha..so just let it pass..i believe in better in time..

todayssssssss

is a tough day for me...finally i know the answer..is not the answer i want but at least i feel realease..is a bit sad but i believe that i will get better in time..because everything get better in time...so tomorrow will be another new day for me..i will start my whole new life tomorrow..hope it is a great day for me..yea..i know it will be a busy day for me

evaluation on my classmates' blogs

as i said earlier i have another japanese blog. now i am in japanese class and today's lesson is evaluate on others's blog. is quite a difficult job for me because all of them are my friend. so i did not gave too low mark. the lowest marks i gave is 7.5 out of 10. today is not a very happy day for me. i dont know why my mood will be affected by you. maybe better in time by leaona lewis now is suitable for me. actually i dont know whether what are u thinking but i just do my best to get in contact with u. sometimes i feel lost when i did not get to contact u. i hope the feeling will lost very soon and i will get to know what are u thinking.

Better in time by Leona Lewis

It's been the longest winter without you

I didn't know where to turn to See somehow I can't forget you

After all that we've been through

Going coming thought I heard a knock

Who's there no one

Thinking that I deserve it

Now I realise that I really didn't know

If you didn't notice you mean everything

Quickly I'm learning to love again

All I know is I'm gon' be ok

[Chorus:]Thought I couldn't live without you

It's gonna hurt when it heals too

It'll all get better in time

And even though I really love you

I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to

It'll all get better in time

I couldn't turn on the TV

Without something there to remaind me

Was it all that easy

To just put aside your feelings

If I'm dreaming don't wanna laugh

Hurt my feelings but that's the path

I believe in And I know that time will heal it

If you didn't notice boy you meant everything

Quickly I'm learning to love again

All I know is I'm gon' be ok

[Chorus:]Thought I couldn't live without you

It's gonna hurt when it heals too

It'll all get better in time

And even though I really love you

I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to

It'll all get better in time

Since there's no more you and me

It's time I let you go So I can be free

And live my life how it should be

No matter how hard it is

I'll be fine without you

Yes I will

[Chorus: X2]Thought I couldn't live without you

It's gonna hurt when it heals too

It'll all get better in time

And even though I really love you

I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to

It'll all get better in time

everyday is a happy day since monday

i have a very happy monday. is the happiest day since i came to penang. i done well in my presentation. i was so happy about that. and another happy thing is..yes..finally i got it..thanks to my grandmother for everything. because that day i went to her grave and tell her to help me in two things. and she really did. i feel so thankful to her. but one thing very sad is i did not go back when she pass away. i feel very guilty about that. and i also feel something more guilty. during chinese new year 2008, i went back to my grandmother house as usual. but the different is i dont know why when i when i reached there i just keep crying and dont feel like staying there. i cry a lot. and my mom scold me and said, sure something bad will happened this year. where got ppl cry like this in chinese new year. i really did not think of my grandmother will pass away so fast. yea she is old and she was sick but she getting healthy. i really did not think of she will pass away in this year. my mom was so sad. and i feel so guilty. because it seems my fault since i was crying during the chinese new year. is not a good sign for chinese ppl, should not be crying in chinese new year.......thanks my grandmother that help me realise my dream, not the whole of my dream but still thanks because already realised half of it. hope she rest in peace in heaven.

another gloomy week

yea...i just came back to usm after the Hari Raya break. is only a one week break but a lot of things happened. there are happy things and unhappy things for sure. last last sunday was the happiest sunday i ever had. i coincidently have a date with him and yea...i thought it was just simply a date with movies and meals but it was more than that. i did not expect anything from him at the beginning. but after that date, i think that i have some good feeling on him. i started to get nearer to him but the unlucky things happened. whenever i want to get closer, i felt that i became farer. now, i am far from distance and even heart. i miss him so much but he never know it and he wont appreciate everything i did. i dont know what happened to me. i felt myself very bad. i am not loyal to anyone untill i met him. but the loyalty to him useless. he did not even give me any news from him. i rather remain relationship like before. i dont know. i just like him even he just ignore me. help me!!!!!!!!! how to get out of this? now i trying to concentrate on my study and forget about him. hm..yea..i think coming back to usm and started to study is a good thing for me and is a chance for me to forget him. but in deep deep of my heart i still missing him a lot and hope to meet him once again. yea..starting this week i must not think too much about him anymore. i swear.......................