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i am studying in university science malaysia penang campus now. trying to enjoy my university life. hoping everything will get better soon.

Friday, February 27, 2009

this is my now

what to do with life?
i don't really understand what mean by life actually.
am i sounding too pessimistic?
when i have to make a decision, why do i need to think?
Can i just decide without thinking?
Do i need a reason to hate someone?
Do i need a reason to leave something?
Can i have the time to stop a while for me?
Is really hard when you have to make a decision when you don't really feel like you want to do
i felt really hard
i had think thousand times actually
What makes me stay in the club?
i still can cheat myself with some minor reasons before this
but after yesterday, i can't think of a reason why i should stay in the club
but i can think reasonssssss why i should leave the club
so? have i made a right decision?
what will happened next?
i really wanted to get involve in the activities
but who cares about what i felt?
i am invisible today
the feeling is really bad
because of that i had really made my decision to leave
but why i felt quite bad after i wrote the letter to the president?
i thought myself had already made the decision
i already sent the letter
i have no turning back
i think i should look forward now to find my new road
i think there are always opportunities in life

i always don't like this person but i can't tell the reason
finally i got the reasons two days ago
should i be happy? or should i congratz myself for having one more enemy in this world?
or should i just close one eye and keep on diguising?
OMG..i hate to be fake
why i can't always be myself?
why should i care about how people think of me?

how can i satisfy her?
this is the biggest problem i have now
too many things to think of
this is my now.......

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