Sensitive > me

am i too sensitive sometimes?
i am thinking of how to change myself lately
i think i still have a lot to change
how can i be less dependent to others?
sometime too dependent is kinda irritating
and will become burden sometime
i don't want to become burden to anyone
i know you might not think that i am a burden
but when you get angry with me sometimes
i feel like i am a burden to you
there are times i think nonsense
i know i will be very disappointed and sad if you went off my life
i don't know how can i satisfied you
i get emotional easily sometimes
i hope you can understand my feelings well
at the same time i will try to understand you too
you always say i cannot understand certain thing
but actually i understand just i used to become the person that always have "priority" at home
i wish to become a priority for you too
you said i am but i felt that i am not
am i too sensitive?
i think i am
but this is who i am
how can i change to become a less sensitive people
i just wish things can be different sometimes
tones of work waiting for me now
i got headache again everyday
do you know that?
you always say you care for me, i felt it sometime
i felt it not sometime
..................................................Sensitve > ME..............................................

something in my life

as my friend said i am very "good" in critisizing others
is not good to critisize right?
i think so not good
but sometime i just come out some cristizing words
haha..thats me :P

but one thing i now
when i am critisizing someone here
and there will be someone critisize me too
lately i found that she is not as bad as i think
maybe she just lack of some communication skill
she act fierce maybe she don't know how to communicate with students
or maybe in the bottom of her heart she want to hide something
maybe that is one kind of protection towards herself
she just express herself in a "unkind" way
that is my impression towards her now

i saw in my friend's profile
this is written in his profile
"in Love, there is someone who offer the cheek and someone who kisses the cheek"
yes, i felt that is very true
i won't offer my cheek or kiss someone cheek if i don't love that person
i like this phrase

next week i going to hand in 3 assignments
i dont 1 of it
still working hard on the other two
just "stealing" some time to write in an entry

sem end exam coming soon
two weeks later will be study week
after that i will have my exam
why the exam time for my co-course so weird this time?
the exam till 29th, i am going back on 30th
aiks..i should get a 29th one
cos everybody is going back on 29th :(
but no choice now, already booked the air ticket
first time fly from penang to kl
i think will feel very good because i save at least 3 hours and 15 minutes
hahahahahahha....

submitted the form to become buddy lately
still waiting for the interview
but i heard that i need to come back earlier for the buddy stuff
aiks..already bought air ticket
hope i can excluded from this time activity if i success in the interview

nice trip

i had a nice trip last weekend
since there are 3 days continuous holidays because of prophets mohammad birthday
i went to langkawi with my friend

this trip is quite different than before
i went to places that are different than which i went before
first day, i reached the jetty at about 7.45am
the ferry was 8.15am
so after got the ticket i went to the jetty and get the ferry
i reached there at about 11.00am
it was a very long journey in the ferry
felt so tired
after reached the hotel
got some rest then went out to underwater world which is just 15 minutes walk from the hotel
this is the schedule for first day

second day, i got car rental
then drove to gunung machincang
on the way, stopped by harbour park and have lunch
around half an hour
reached gunung machincang
the cable car is really quite expensive
aiks..i forgot to bring my mykad
so have to pay rm30 for the ticket
but when reached up the mountain
wow..feel like in genting
nice view up there
i never been so cool in langkawi
haha..
after that, went to the seven wells
long long walked :(
hot..sweat...
reached the waterfall but nothing there
only the same view as i seen on gunung machincang
around 6pm, went back to hotel to bath
then drove again to town and shopping
around 9.45pm drove back to shop and return the car
stupid car rental store said wanna fined rm20 because we late for 20 minutes
we argued for a while
finally i won
hahaaha....
raining, but have to walked back to hotel
luckily is not too far
at the entrence of the road to hotel
there is a restaurant
have dinner there
nice food..better than what i ate for the first day
getting tired
reached hotel
sleep....
the end of second day

third day...
in the morning, went to the sea and swim
the sun was really hot
after than went to the mall near underwater wolrd again to buy some chocolate
then called taxi to fetch to jetty point again
ate lunch there, then online at starbucks and wait for the ferry
not happy because going to leave
:( time up, went to ferry
sleep for a while
sunset..
very nice one
went to the dashboard of the ferry and enjoyed the beautiful of sunset
its only 4 minutes
the sunset makes me feel
beautiful and happy time gone in a blink of eyes
and after all the nice thing
we have to come to the cruel reality again

is a sad sad night for me

wish i could have chance again soon

have lots of nice pic..bt don't know why couldn't upload

thank you

thank you Wen Ding for today cos accompany me walk here and there just to get my ferry ticket, thank you very much

there is nothing fair in this world, is it true?

after i had give up on something, will i get back something as replacement?

Life is too short to allow me to think too much

Life is too short to have too much miserable things

Life is too short to let me hate someone

but, there are still too much to think of, too many miserable things happened and someone to hate

Is everything happening now is a dream?

will i wake up someday and lost everything?

i thought i will be better today, but i still feeling very "bu gan xin" because of the debate club stuff

but, who knows my leaving will be a good thing for me

i know even if i stay there i will not have chance

no chance to be who i want to be

am i convincing myself that leaving is correct?

At the end of the day, is actually just between you and me.

So, should i care?

this is my now

what to do with life?
i don't really understand what mean by life actually.
am i sounding too pessimistic?
when i have to make a decision, why do i need to think?
Can i just decide without thinking?
Do i need a reason to hate someone?
Do i need a reason to leave something?
Can i have the time to stop a while for me?
Is really hard when you have to make a decision when you don't really feel like you want to do
i felt really hard
i had think thousand times actually
What makes me stay in the club?
i still can cheat myself with some minor reasons before this
but after yesterday, i can't think of a reason why i should stay in the club
but i can think reasonssssss why i should leave the club
so? have i made a right decision?
what will happened next?
i really wanted to get involve in the activities
but who cares about what i felt?
i am invisible today
the feeling is really bad
because of that i had really made my decision to leave
but why i felt quite bad after i wrote the letter to the president?
i thought myself had already made the decision
i already sent the letter
i have no turning back
i think i should look forward now to find my new road
i think there are always opportunities in life

i always don't like this person but i can't tell the reason
finally i got the reasons two days ago
should i be happy? or should i congratz myself for having one more enemy in this world?
or should i just close one eye and keep on diguising?
OMG..i hate to be fake
why i can't always be myself?
why should i care about how people think of me?

how can i satisfy her?
this is the biggest problem i have now
too many things to think of
this is my now.......

blogss

wow...long time did not log in to blogspot and read others blog
reading now
really got to know a lot of things
hm...this is the benefit of blog
can 8 ppl stuffs..hahahahha

i have a bad day

today is the first time i been scold by a lecturer so so badly
feel very very unhappy now
i heard everyone said she is a biased teacher
after i heard that i already getting be careful when she is teaching
i don't really believe in the beginning but day by day
i think i HAVE TO believe it
she just scold scold scold scold in every lesson
scold more than teach
always make students feel bad
i don't know how others think but she really make me feel bad
and i refuse to attend her class
i attend because i have no choice
we are just like primary student that just started the second level of a language
why she want to scold scold scold instead of tried to teach us and correct our mistake?
now i know which one is better
is it a mistake i had taken japanese as minor?
i don't really like it at the beginning, but since Rika sensei is very good, i feel like the subject is still ok for me
but....aiks...second half of this semester is just like shit
i really scared i will get very bad grade this time
two weeks later will have an interview with the "pronounciation queen"
i already done not that good in the last interview
i scare this time i will be worst because she makes me think that
she hates me so much
she cant even pronounce the "h" well
but she still crictic on our pronounciation
omg....how long i still have to stand with this fucker?
she really makes me want to scold her with bad word
is it she is in pre-menopause or what?
she argue with her husband everyday?
or is she married?
almost the end of last semester
i feel better with japanese
but now.......
it's complicated
pls pray for my sem end exam
i hope i wont get bad grade for japanese
yeah..one more thing..
i hope "someone" (i guess ppl who are reading this will know who is that) can tell me through what mistake i had made during the discussion
i know is my responsible for my own mistake
you can blame me after the presentation
but we are learning together right?
so i hope you can tell me my mistake during the discussion but not blaming me after the presentation
if you mind that because my mistake i had made the group get scolded, then i apologize.